So tired. Physically and emotionally.

I spent one whole week non-stop doing the slides for GFG camp. It was one week left when they decided to change the concept of the slides. Goodness, it was hell back then. For that week I slept only 3 hours daily. I first do research, draft out, text out and picture out. It was madness. Mad, mad, madness.

The slides turned out to be great in the camp, with few glitches. But I felt "emo", not because of the process or the outcome, but because of the content of the slides.

Herbie Hancock was my subject.

He has changed the history of jazz literally. Without him, jazz will be just playing the saxophone, piano, cello and other strings ensemble. Yes, he was the one who added funk into jazz. Never heard of it before? Actually, most of the jazz music now has a bit of funk or even very funk in it. It was many years ago when he took a risk to add funk into jazz. A lot of critics think it was a talent wasted. Who in the world is stupid enough to spoil jazz by putting something elctronic inside? Well, he proved them wrong and his first jazz-funk music won him a Grammy. Now, he even beat Amy Winehouse (Whine-house? =P) in the Grammies by winning two more. His total Grammies is TWELVE. That's a lot.

His new album "River: The Joni Letters" is really wonderful and beautiful, by the way.

The depressing thing is that while researching on him, his younger days weren't really good in the sense that he was studying electrical engineering when he has a passion for music. Eventhough he did quite well mid-way in his course, he felt the music in him. When he decided to follow his heart, his mother was really against it. But he changed his course to study music.
Finally, his mother gave in, knowing that his son will make her proud, hoping the best from him.

What?

Sigh. It's really depressing to hear this in my current situation. Why can't I have the courage to be as firm as him? I felt that my dream was decided by my parents. Even if I was given a chance to decide my dream, reality hits me hard. Will I be able to support a family of my own? Should I continue my dream as a pianist or should I recheck my reality?

I feel fucked. The more I think, the more I don't want to study.

*Oi! Study la, dumb fuck!*

I actually heard that from my head few days ago. Sigh.

At least I feel lighter after posting this. =D

I would like to thank the GFG committee for making this camp great. It was fun, unless you see the background, where there were many last minute changes, tension flared and committee getting crazy. Yet, the camp was wonderful and it's all thanks to the committee (including me ar). We hope that the members have learnt a lot of things through this camp. So does the committee =P.